My spousal unit came home the other day and asked if I thought social media caused depression. Initially, I though he was checking in on my mental well being. Because I have firsthand knowledge that social media does cause depression.
Geez, there are times when I must separate myself from the internet. I don’t believe this was a problem for me until the whole I quit my job and now can’t seem to secure a new one fiasco.
It plays on the mental psyche. When I get on social media and see so many influencers killing it by staying at home and trying on clothes. They are going on vacations; they get those meal kits delivered to their door. Someone is paying them to do this, to post this on their daily feed. To just live this life of luxury, and here I am simply trying to get a job interview for jobs that I am very much qualified to do.
No one is paying me to take a picture of the last meal I ate. Where do you even find those people? No one is sending me vitamins.
Searching the internet
If you were to do a quick internet search of does social media cause depression, you come back with studies regarding children and adolescents. And yes, it causes depression in that age range. But what about us grown ass adults?
I do not need a study to answer that question. The answer is yes, yes social media causes depression in grown ass adults.
It has been stated that social media “can enhance connection, increase self-esteem, and improve a sense of belonging. But it can also lead to tremendous stress, pressure to compare oneself to others, and increased sadness and isolation.”
“Enhance connection,” lets hit on that for a moment. Sure, I have met some quality long distance friends from social media. Therefore, connections have been made. But how many people see the life you post on social media and think you are doing great then do not reach out in real time, real life. What people post on the internet is a highlight reel. You really do not know how one is doing by just seeing what they post to social media. People are substituting social media usage for face-to-face social interactions.
A disconnection? Yeah, that is what you should do – disconnect from social media
It is a disconnection from real-world relationships. Many people would not post that today is the anniversary of their mothers’ death and they are having a hard time this week. Or their dog just got diagnosed with cancer and they are having a hard time processing this information. If you reached out and made real contact with your people, a phone call, or a meet up for coffee – you would know this. You could be there for them, if even just a listening ear, a support team. So often a listening ear is the most important role you can play.
Did you know that in-person human contact is known to trigger parts of our nervous system that release dopamine and oxytocin, the “happy” chemicals that help regulate our response to stress and anxiety. It also helps lower cortisol, the main stress hormone. You are not getting the “happy” from looking at social media. We humans need that human touch, the human interaction.
Read a book
I have been reading the book, Burnout, The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle. There is a lot of pent up anger that I am harboring, which is causing me stress, and I am in the process of learning how to let it go. I have always had a lot of anger but recently it is a different kind and I want to move past this stage. There are so many pages in the book that I have dog eared. I know there will be people who hate me for that. But I like to mark the pages that make the most sense to me and go back over them. Often, I write them down in a journal to reflect on later. One of my dog-eared pages has a passage about human interaction. (There is no mention of social media).
Human touch
“Hug someone you love and trust for twenty full seconds, while both of you are standing over your own centers of balance. Hold on. The research suggests a twenty-second hug can change your hormones, lower your blood pressure, and heart rate and improve mood, all of which are reflected in the post hug increase in the social-bonding hormone oxytocin”. Look, here we are again with this feel-good hormone that comes from human interaction.
The other day I mentioned putting your phone down and being present, that is the human interaction that needs to happen.
Log off social media.
Check on your people in real time, a phone call or meet up.
Try a twenty second hug.
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